As the baby boomers begin to age, Medicare benefits worsen, and insurance companies deny claims for basic requests, the ability to age gracefully weakens. Fortunately health care developments and new technology has gradually increased lifespan, however many are then straddled down with higher medical bills and needs in a society where both finding employment and insurance coverage is biased towards the young and healthy. With that, the next generation steps in to care their grandparents, parents, aunts and uncles, and any other elderly family members or friends.

The stress of these situations can be overwhelming- whether you work everyday to come home to provide the income for their bills or spend each day helping someone get out of bed, bathe, and feed themselves. Little gratitude may be expressed as the sick are unaware of the burden they bring or have difficulty accepting the position that life has placed on them.

In these situations, caregiver burnout is rampant. You may spend hours a day worrying about making sure your loved one is taken care of, figuring out how you’ll manage with your own children, job, and bills, and the rest of the time actually providing that care. But you need to also worry about your health- emotional, physical, and mental. Otherwise, anger, stress, and guilt can build up and lead towards depression, inefficiency at work, and a resentful relationship with your loved one.

1.   Take a break and get help.

It’s not a sign of weakness or unloving to get someone else to provide that care for a few hours a day. You need the time to yourself to focus on other things- whether it may be a hot relaxing shower without worrying that your loved one will fall or wander away or to socialize with friends for a good conversation or a glass of wine. There are adult day care centers, home health providers, or another family member that can step in to assist.

2.   Pick up a hobby.

With all the time and effort that you spend on your family, it’s time that you do something for yourself routinely. Pick up a book to read, go for a walk or run, develop an arts and craft project, follow your favorite sports team, cook, or garden. Let your mind wander away to focus on indulging yourself for a bit.

3.   Seek counseling or caregiver support group.

Speaking with others in the same situation or someone who can help you weed through your feelings, fears, and goals can help you understand your situation and your loved ones more clearly.

4.   Seek professional help for your loved one.

There may be a chance that therapists- recreational, physical, occupational, or speech therapists can assist. If merited, your loved one can qualify to receive these services and help you help your loved one. If your loved one is having difficulty getting out or bed or walking, performing basic daily activities such as dressing and grooming, or processing their thoughts or communicating their needs, these professionals can work with you and your loved one to facilitate the care you provide.